That's all I keep thinking about these days. I kept reading through my archives, and also read the archives of the 08S26 class blog I used to maintain with other friends. Thinking about what was, really sets you thinking about what could be. How lives change so quickly, or how I feel like I'm stuck in a time warp.

My bestest best friend got accepted to a university that I myself was dreaming about applying to. I am not only so proud and happy for her, but I am also envious of her. Lest for certain glitches in her way, she's practically all set to go about the next phase of her life - the journey that we talk about all the time. I can't help but feel envious of those around me, the ones all gearing up for university life, travelling places, taking up new adventures. Soon it'll be my turn, but for now, I feel as if I've lost the fire.

Does this happen to everyone? Like I lost some steam, some of my drive is lost in the void of nothingness. I mean, I can safely say that I could probably end up flunking most of my papers, because I really have not studied much, if not, at all. I mean it's not something that I am proud or boastful of, but fact is fact. I don't know why or how it is that I've lost my drive - it all doesn't make much sense. I mean, I'm probably partly distracted and at the same time, I just can't remember why I am doing all this. It's not right, because I have no time to waste as I come closer to my A Levels.

I have to stop living in the past, in my bubble, and remember what my priorities are. I've waited so long for my time, for my turn. I cannot afford to lose it all just because I've hit some sort of a crisis.

Come on Cheang, don't give up now.

I value my past, my experiences, but it's time I set the sail due north. Forward is the only way to go!

Labels: Reveries

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